Your determination is your free will.

 Its about 10 pm. I'm about to go and say my evening prayers but before that I am writing about G K Chesterton, who I hope I shared a link from him, an article about a miraculous cross from Saint Thomas Aquinas.

I remember writing about that now. I decided that that what was found to be straw at the kind letting him in on his impending death was that Jesus giving us of himself is simple really, spiritually, and being just and kind really is terribly simple stuff. So much straw. And he didn't even get to finish it. It shames the wise. Remember?

The article is pinned to the screen and I accidentally hit the icon, so there it was. And then I wanted MORE CHESTERTON! So I ended up on YouTube, watching something about Job. 

In the middle of it they are grappling with free will again, which exasperated me because I could easily forget the whole scientific b.smarts., if they were any less considerate of Christian feelings, ... 

Really it seems a lottery of possibilities all the time, so much that we have the freedom always to make anything happen, or at least start it up. I was coming up with a lot of ideas about that and I realized that, and there was a paradox present in determinism and free will, I realized that your determination is what makes your will free. If I'm determined to go upstream, or change the cosmos, or light a fire, it is my making, and not the best possible, suitable choice. 

I hate the whole debate. Whoever said "i know I have free will so just go to heck with you" that was a smart one.